Movie Review: The Company Men

The Company Men is one of those movies is a fairly accurate depiction of the ramifications of The Great Recession.  It's a movie with a point, and on a small scale, provides part of the reason for the United States of America as it stands today. 

Needless to say, this isn't a happy movie, and about 3/4 of the way through, I thought it was a needlessly pessimistic movie, when it ended, I found it almost too optimistic.  I'll get to that later.

The Company Men is about three businessmen, all at different stages in their lives, and how they react to being dealt the same curveball. 

Tommy Lee Jones plays Gene McCleary, who helped start GSX Corporation with James Salinger(Craig T Nelson, playing a total prick).  During the economic downturn, the company is forced to downsize, close down shipyards, and lay off employees.  This isn't because they are hemorrhaging money, they made a profit of 22 million that year, its because their shareholders demanded a larger profit margin.  This is the source of the ideological divide between Salinger and McCleary.  McCleary believes that a company's job is to provide for its employees and its community, Salinger believes in the maximization of the bottom line. 

Ben Affleck plays a young, successful salesmen who gets laid off.  Its hard to like him early in the movie, as he's kind of an arrogant prick who doesn't seem to grasp what kind of job market he's been dropped into.  However, he is the one character in the movie who experiences some kind of a redemption. 

This is an extremely well cast and well acted movie.  Chris Cooper plays the most depressing character in the film, and sadly, his optionless character is tragically accurate. 

There really is no great revelation at the end of this movie.  The villians do not meet an untimely demise, in fact, James Salinger ends up making even more money.  But the protagonists reassess their principles and move forward.  And although its kind of a downer to see them leap back into the rat race with such relish, their commitment to their principles ends the movie on an uptick.  Although its nice that Affleck and Jones land on their feet.  I think its interesting that this movie chose to depict how the lives of three white collar workers were affected.  I would've liked to see how characters that spanned a wider economic range rather than the spectrum ranging from six figures to filthy rich.

Definitely a film worth watching though.

Horror Movie Review: Sinister

Review of the film SINISTER (2012) by Nick Anderson

 

“Don’t worry daddy…I’ll make you famous again.”

In “Sinister”, Ellison Oswalt (Ethan Hawke), a true crime writer, moves with his family into a home where a horrific murder took place. Oswalt is hoping to resurrect his flagging career by writing a new bestseller about the case. He discovers a mysterious box in the attic that contains several Super 8 tapes. Each tape features grainy footage of a family being murdered. In each instance, the parents and an older child are killed but a younger child is nowhere to be found. As his research into the case progresses,  Oswalt realizes that a pagan deity named Bagul may be behind the killings. Meanwhile, his wife Tracy (Juliet Rylance) and son Trevor (Michael Hall D’Addario) grow increasingly nervous about their new home. Ellison’s daughter Ashley (Clare Foley) tells him about a mysterious girl that she sees traipsing around the house. Oswalt soon starts to experience terrifying visions of the ghosts of the missing children, as well as of Bagul himself.

“Sinister” utilizes both conventional cinematography and the “found footage” style popularized by “The Blair Witch Project” and the “Paranormal Activity” series. The film’s creepiest moments are found in the eerie home videos depicting the demises of Bagul’s past victims. Although the tree hanging is memorable, the one that I found the creepiest involved a family being drowned. Each member of the family is strapped to a lawnchair and then plunged into a pool one by one. Imagine being tied down, completely helpless, listening to the rest of your family drown and knowing that you are about to meet the same fate.

Bagul is an interesting villain. He is an ancient Babylonian deity who uses images of himself to travel from his world to ours. As long as pictures of him exist, he can use them as portals to attack more victims. Bagul is able to possess people and manipulate them into performing horrific acts, similar to the demons found in many other horror films. He also preys on children and steals their souls, similar to characters like Pennywise and Freddy Krueger.

Like most horror movies, “Sinister” does not feature any standout performances. Hawke and the rest of the cast are serviceable. They are good enough to get the job done, and that’s usually all a horror film needs.

The film relies too much on jump scares at times. Having a ghost (or an evil ancient pagan deity) suddenly appear out of nowhere is always a good way to get a cheap jolt out of the audience, but it only works once. Truly creepy horror movies are still effective after multiple viewings.  Director Scott Derrickson does a solid job of building a sense of tension and dread. He didn’t need to include so many jump scares.

The film’s relentlessly bleak ending is harsh even by horror movie standards, but it’s the only logical way for the film to conclude. There is no quick fix or cheap resolution. The final scene suggests the possibility of a sequel, and the film’s box office success makes this seem likely. Perhaps Bagul will someday be regarded as an iconic villain.

“Sinister” is a solid choice for those looking for a dark, creepy horror movie. It’s more original than most recent genre offerings. In an added bonus, it’s not a remake, a sequel, or a reboot.

 

Rating: 7/10

The Oscars Drinking Game

Here at Table 71 we love a good awards show.  Nothing quite exemplifies the entertainment industry quite like four hour awards shows dedicated to fawning over their own accomplishments.  There is no greater awards show than the Oscars, so we decided to create a drinking game.

As always we have chosen 7 events that will probably show up periodically throughout the show. When these events take place you take a "drink".  There are three "Shot events". You know the drill.

    The only other rule we have at Table 71 for our Drinking Games is have fun. You are enjoying a good show with good people (or alone if that is the way you swing.. we don't judge). 
And so without further gilding the lily and with no more ado, I give to you here is the 2013 Academy Awards Drinking Game.

 

Drink everytime someone is speaking and the music comes on

Drink everytime someone gets political

Drink everytime someone says the name "Weinstein"
 

Drink everytime someone needs to use a piece of paper for their speech

Drink everytime someone acts surprised that they won

Drink everytime seth mcfarlane uses a Family Guy character voice

Take a shot if Seth McFarland sings

Take a shot if someone mentions Meryl Streep

Take a shot for Tony Scott

Movie Drinking Games. Post 5. Anchorman

Here at Table 71 we love a good flick.  We also love a good cocktail.  However what we enjoy even more is mixing those two together. As always we have chosen 7 events that show up periodically throughout the movie.  When these events take place you take a "drink".  We have also chosen 3 events that show up only once in the movie.  These are the "shot" events.  It is very important that you don't miss the shot events.  The only other rule we have at Table 71 for our Movie Drinking Games is have fun.  You are enjoying a good movie with good people (or alone if that is the way you swing.. we don't judge)

Without any further ado here are the official drinking game rules for Anchorman.

Anchorman

Take a drink for every sexist comment.
Take a drink everytime Ron speaks to Baxter.
Take a drink everytime Brick Tamblan says something stupid.
Take a drink everytime Champ Kind says "Whammy".
Take a drink everytime Brian Fantana humilates himself.
Take a drink everytime you see another news team.
Take a drink everytime Veronica Corningstone makes someone look stupid.
Take a shot for the "Furry Tractor".
Take a shot for not calling Dorothy Mantooth.
Take a shot for the Jazz Flute.

If you have a movie that you would like us to turn into a drinking game please leave in the comments below.  Now go enjoy your night at the movies!

A Horror Movie Monster Manual

Horror films (and television shows, books, etc.) have featured countless different types of terrifying monstrosities over the years. Some of them have struck a chord with the public and have been used repeatedly. Here is a tongue-in-cheek look at some of the most commonly used genre monsters and how to survive an encounter with them.

Demons

 

 

Definition: Demons are evil, malevolent supernatural beings. They are usually associated with the Devil and Satanism.

Traditional portrayals: Demons are pure evil and take great delight in torturing humans. Unlike ghosts, demons have no human characteristics. They often possess the bodies of vulnerable people and force them to commit horrific acts against their will. There were many demons in the religious-themed horror films of the late ‘60s and ‘70s. Demons have made a resurgence in recent years as well. Examples of demon film portrayals include “The Exorcist” (1973), “The Last Exorcism” (2010) and (arguably) the malevolent entity in the “Paranormal Activity” series.

Alternative portrayals: The demonic Pinhead from the “Hellraiser” series is portrayed as a former human, a British World War I veteran who is transported to Hell after gaining possession of a supernatural puzzle box.

Why They Might Kill You: If you get possessed by a demon, you’re pretty much screwed. You will be a prisoner inside your own body, able only to watch helplessly as you puke green slime, swear incessantly, snap people’s necks, commit unspeakable acts with crucifixes, and so on. Once the demon has tired of you, it will move on to its next victim and leave you to rot.

How to Defeat Them: An exorcism is usually the best way to expel a demon from a person or a household. Holy water burns demons and can be a useful weapon. Crosses are effective as well.

Ghosts

 

 

Definition: A ghost is the spirit of a deceased human or animal who, for whatever reason, has remained on Earth after death. They are typically attached to one particular location and remain there indefinitely. They are not to be confused with demons, who were never human and are usually even more dangerous.

Traditional Portrayals: Many ghosts take delight in tormenting humans, especially people who are living in the ghost’s former home. Other ghosts have stayed on Earth because they are trying to resolve unfinished business from their lifetimes. Ghosts can manipulate objects, make noises, play pranks, make objects disappear, and even materialize if they can summon enough energy. Their goal is typically to either to scare the hell out people or to communicate some sort of message. Examples are “Poltergeist” (1982) and “The Haunting” (1964, remade 1999).

Alternative Portrayals: Some ghosts are depicted as being unaware that they are dead, as in“The Sixth Sense” (1999). Other ghosts continue to relentlessly follow people no matter where they go as in the “The Grudge” (2004).

Why They Might Kill You: Their ability to manipulate objects makes them a potentially lethal adversary. You never know when you might be shoved into a burning fireplace or have an axe hurtled at your neck.

How to Defeat Them: Ghosts, of course, cannot be killed because they are already dead. They are not even “undead” like zombies and vampires. They’re just dead, period. A séance might be helpful if you have an Ouija board handy. Perhaps the ghost will leave you alone once they have communicated with you. Hiring a legitimate psychic, like the creepy old lady from “Poltergeist”, could also do the trick. If a ghost cannot be appeased, however, the only solution is to simply leave their haunted house and never return.

Vampires

 

Definition: Vampires are fanged undead beings who survive by sucking and drinking the blood of humans.

Traditional Portrayals: Vampires are seductive, attractive, charismatic, intelligent, and pure evil. They can often hypnotize a human by simply gazing into their eyes. Despite these attributes, they have many weaknesses. Sunlight is fatal to them, so they can only come out at night. Vampires tend to be very arrogant and sometimes underestimate their potential victims. They are also sometimes portrayed as having obsessive-compulsive tendencies. Some vampires can transform into bats and fly. Examples of traditional vampires include Dracula, Jerry Dandridge from“Fright Night” (1985, remade in 2011), and Barlow from the Stephen King novel “Salem’s Lot” (1975).

Alternative Portrayals: Some vampires are portrayed sympathetically. They genuinely care –or at least seem to care – about some of the human beings they encounter. Examples include some of the vampires in the HBO series “True Blood”, Nyssa from “Blade II”, and Abby from “Let Me In” and “Let the Right One In”. Even in these cases, however, the vampires often exhibit violent and amoral tendencies.

Why They Might Kill You: Despite their limitations, vampires have many advantages over humans. Many vampires are hundreds or even thousands of years old, giving them a massive experience advantage over any human being. They also have the ability to “glammer” humans and force them to do their bidding. And did I mention that vampires tend to be extremely attractive?

How to Defeat Them: There are all sorts of ways to destroy a vampire. Drive a stake through their heart, shoot them with silver bullets, expose them to sunlight, chop off their head, or dismember their body. Crosses and holy water are also sometimes effective, but only if you have complete faith that they will work. Garlic drives vampires batty, so if your goal is simply to keep a vampire away, stock up on it. Also, a vampire cannot enter a private home unless they have been invited by the rightful owner.

Werewolves

 

Definition: Humans who have the ability to transform (sometime voluntarily, sometimes not) into a wolf or wolf-man hybrid during a full moon.

Traditional Portrayals: Werewolves are reckless, vicious creatures that hunt and kill humans and other creatures with impunity. They use their powerful jaws and superhuman strength to dismember and devour humans and other animals. They sometimes do not remember, or are unaware, of their activities after they return to human form. Examples include the werewolves in “The Howling” (1981) and its sequels and the Lon Chaney “Wolfman” movies of the 1940’s. The Canadian horror flick “Ginger Snaps” features a rebellious teenage girl who gradually transforms after being bitten by a werewolf.

Alternative Portrayals: Like vampires, werewolves have been portrayed sympathetically on occasion. They are sometimes depicted as being ashamed of their behavior and having no control over their transformations. An example is David Naughton in “An American Werewolf in London” (1981).

Why They Might Kill You: Few supernatural monsters possess the sheer strength, speed and power of werewolves. They can cause massive carnage on an almost unimaginable scale. A werewolf could singlehandedly take down a whole pack of zombies and would be able to hold its own against vampires as well.

How to Defeat Them: Silver bullets are the classic method, but aren’t usually a requirement. Most movie werewolves can be killed by more conventional means, such as being hit by a car. Don’t bother sprinkling them with holy water though, that will just piss them off.

Zombies

 

Definition: Zombies are reanimated corpses that feast on human flesh.

Traditional portrayals: Zombies are relentless, slow-moving, and unintelligent. They are extremely single-minded and have no interest other than the pursuit and consumption of living humans. The only sounds they make are grunts and moans. George Romero’s“Living Dead” series set the standard for how zombies are portrayed.

Alternative portrayals: The “Return of the Living Dead” series and the recent spoof “Warm Bodies” feature zombies who can talk, are somewhat intelligent, and exhibit some human characteristics. The remake of “Dawn of the Dead” (2004) features zombies who have the ability to run.

Why They Might Kill You: In most zombie films and television shows, surviving humans are vastly outnumbered by the zombies. Inevitably, the zombies eventually overrun and overwhelm the humans, either killing them or turning them into zombies themselves.

How to Defeat Them: An individual zombie is one of the easiest monsters to subdue in the horror genre. Anyone with a gun and halfway decent aim should be able to blast these shuffling, dim-witted creatures to kingdom come. A direct shot to the head will do the trick. Dismemberment works too. Unfortunately, zombies usually hunt in packs, so hopefully you have plenty of ammunition.

1992 Movie Bracket

So here at Table 71 we have decide to do an ultimate movie bracket for each year.  What that means is that we take the Top 10 movies by Domestic Gross Sales, put in six wild cards and have them duke it out to see what will reign supreme as the top movie of the year.  We seed the movies based on their Rotten Tomato score and may the best one win.

 

The next year we are doing is 1992.  This is the first year where the two people writing this column have had an honest disagreement about who would win.  That is what always these brackets fun.  A good disagreement.  In all honesty this is prepping us for 1994 when it wouldn’t surprise me if we end up in fisticuffs arguing about who should be the winner.   But I digress.  Without any further ado here are the top movies of 1992!

 

 

 

First Round

 

(1)        Unforgiven vs (16) Home Alone 2

 

Unforgiven kicked off an era of the dark, pensive western. It was often imitated, but in the scourge of westerns that followed, none duplicated the hard edged, grim philosophy quite as well as Unforgiven. At this point in Clint Eastwoods career, he was kind of in that stage of an older guy whose prime might have passed him by. So, he played himself as an old guy whose prime had passed him by.(He would duplicate this role for the next twenty years as well, Trouble With The Curve, Million Dollar Baby, In The Line of Fire, just name any movie). The cast is absolutely outstanding and it deservedly won Best Picture in 1992 as a story of man who fought and eventually succumbed to his nature.

 

What are the redeeming qualities of Home Alone 2?  Um it followed a wildly successful first movie so they wanted to milk it til it’s dry so they made a sequel.  This movie is almost an exact replica of the first one except this time he isn’t left at home, he takes the wrong plane.  That is literally the only difference.  I was six years old when this movie came out and I didn’t like it back then.  I watched it a few years ago and it was even worse.  The only reason why it made the cut is because it was the 10 biggest films of the year.  And now it is the first film that is knocked out. 

 

(8) A League of Their Own vs (9) A Few Good Men

 

Both of these movies have quotes from them that are among the most famous in movie history.  According to the American Film Institute the 54th most famous quote in movie history is “There’s no crying in baseball” my Tom Hanks in A League of Their Own.  The same list also has “You can’t handle the truth” by Jack Nicholson at #29.  One point for A Few Good Men. 

 

Frankly that point is not needed anyways.  While A League of Their Own is an okay movie and actually one of the better ones as far as baseball movies go it does not hold a candle to the brilliance of Nicholson, Tom Cruise, Demi Moore, and Kevin Bacon.  The Truth and A Few Good Men moves on.

 

(4) Aladdin vs (13) Basic Instinct

 

Aladdin continues the trend of the early 90s fantastic Disney Movies.  This movie was always one of my favorites growing up, and I just watched it last year and it held up very well.  One more thing that isn’t mentioned enough in my opinion is that Jafar might be one of the top 3 Disney villains ever.  He is so entertaining and evil that it really brings the whole movie together.

 

And then you have Basic Instinct.  Of course what everyone remembers about this movie is Sharon Stone, and for good reason.  She was so good as novelist Catherine Tramell that you were almost rooting for her to win.  Michael Douglas wasn’t at his best in this movie but he was serviceable.  While serviceable does mean you can make a good movie it does not mean you will advance to the next round.  Aladdin and Abu go on. 

 

(5) Malcom X vs (12) Sister Act

 

Malcom X was a “Spike Lee Joint” about the former public figure who was tragically killed in the height of the racial tension that was the 60s.  Denzel Washington gave one of his best performances ever as Malcolm and was rightly nominated for an Academy Award.  This was Spike Lee truly being Spike Lee and showing how racial issues were handled back then.  His best movies all involve racial tension, and this one might be the best.

 

Sister Act was a movie I never really got into.  I have never been the biggest Whoopie Goldberg fan and this movie wasn’t that much different.  Whoopie plays a singer who witnessed a crime and must go into the witness protection program and they put her in a convent.  Eh.  I have no desire to watch this movie anytime soon, while Malcom X I would definitely watch.  Malcolm easily advances to the Great 8 to do battle with the Genie, Iago, and the rest of the cast from Aladdin. 

 

(2)        Last of the Mohicans vs (15) The Bodyguard

 

Last of the Mohicans is one of those movies that doesn’t need to be celebrated because it is so damn good.  You have Daniel Day-Lewis giving an average Daniel Day-Lewis performance which blows everyone else out of the water, Michael Mann doing what Michael Mann does, and a perfect supporting cast.  I watched this movie when I was in high school and was just in awe of how well it was made. 

 

Look, I'll be honest, The Bodyguard is pretty terrible.  However, it’s a good kind of terrible. It has a great soundtrack, highlighted by Whitney Houston performing one of the greatest covers ever.  It also has Kevin Costner trying really hard to be serious and brooding and Whitney Houston trying to act.  She ended up improving as an actress (see: Waiting to Exhale), but damn was she wooden in this movie.  I honestly feel like Whitney Houston told her people that she wanted to star in a movie, and they hired a screenwriter and bam, came up with this...movie. And you know what, I'm ok with it, it's so ridiculous.

 

There is no way Michael Mann or Daniel Day-Lewis would lose in the first round by themselves.  Put them together and forget about it.  The Bodyguard never had a chance. 

 

(7) My Cousin Vinny vs (10) Batman Returns

 

My Cousin Vinny is one of those movies that is enjoyable, but mostly known for one performance.  In this case, it was Marisa Tomei.  She stole every seen she was in and the banter that Joe Pesci and Tomei had made up for every scene where Ralph Macchio tried to act.  My Cousin Vinny also rates fairly high on the rewatchablility scale as I can jump in at any time in this movie and ride it till the end

 

Batman Returns was the second of Tim Burton's dark, brooding and weirdly cartoony Batman movies.  Much like My Cousin Vinny, this movie had a memorable female performance. Michelle Pfeifer as Catwoman brought the term "Batshit crazy" to another level.  Danny Devito was great as the grunting, heaving, drooling, and utterly disgusting Penquin. And Christopher Walken as Max Shreck, got, how many great lines does he have? Or, does Christopher Walken's delivery make every line sound great? As far as a complete movie, this was Burton's best Batman film, and one of his better films.

 

As far as the matchup, Batman Returns is the better, more complete movie.  Yeah, it's a little dark, but in a smiling while shaking your head kind of way.  And I just love Michelle Pfeifer in that Catwoman outfit.  Favorite line from Batman returns, "Eat floor, high fiber" So, yeah, Batman Returns moves on

 

(3)        Glen Garry Glen Ross vs (14) Lethal Weapon 3

 

Glengarry Glen Ross is an excellent movie about not so excellent people.  There is not a single redeemable character in this film.  They are all salesmen, some spineless, some arrogant, some arrogantly spineless.  This film also includes two great monologues, one by Al Pacino, while subtly trying to convince a guy to buy real estate, and one by Alec Baldwin.  Baldwin sweeps in like a tornado, he's arrogant, wealthy and informs everyone that they are fired and have one week to earn their jobs back.  It's fascinating to see how these sad sack salesmen react.  This movie is based off a play, and its completely dialog driven, and the dialog is excellent.  Jack Lemmon is pathetic and sympathetic at the same time, and, in my opinion, is the best character in this loaded movie.

 

Lethal Weapon 3 was actually my least favorite of the Lethal Weapon movies.  I'm not a huge Rene Russo fan and I thought that she didn't add a lot to this flick.  The Lethal Weapon movies succeed because of the banter between Riggs and Murtaugh and the old school action scenes.  A lot of punching, kicking and gun fights. This still was an enjoyable movie but just not up to par with the first two and not even in the same league as its first round opponent. Sadly Lethal Weapon 3, you've come in second, the prize? A set of steak knives

 

(6) Waynes World vs (11) Patriot Games

 

Patriot Games was one of those ultra dense hard to follow Tom Clancy novels that actually turned into a pretty good and entertaining movie.  Harrison Ford was coming into his "Don't hurt my family" prime and it showed.  Sean Bean was also excellent, because he's Sean Bean and he is always, invariably, without a doubt, excellent in literally every role he's ever been cast in.

 

Waynes World is probably one of the top 5 best comedies of the 90's.  It is also one of the rare times an SNL sketch was turned into a popular movie.  This was an immensely quotable movie and its actually stood the test of time.  If this movie was made in the late 80's, i think there's a chance it could be dated.  However, being made in 1992, grunge has already exploded and the hard rock scene Wayne and Garth adore is becoming flannelized.

 

Patriot Games is a good movie, but Waynes World is a flat out hilarious movie that pokes fun at itself and is kind of endearing at the same time.

 

 

 
Great Eight

 

(1)        Unforgiven vs (9) A Few Good Men

 

I gotta say, myself and my colleague Brian went toe to toe for three days over the result of this next matchup.  It was arduous, intense, a little messy, and I think we were both a little disappointed that these movies were meeting in the second round, not the finals.

 

I think what is fascinating about Unforgiven is this moral dilemma Eastwood's character endured during this movie.  Naturally, in the world of right and wrong, ideally, William Munny learns how to farm, is able to support his family and never gets lured into being a hired gun again.  However, this isn't an ideal world and morality is a cloudy proposition in western's.  What is also interesting is that by the end, the audience is rooting for Munny to revert back to his ways.  There is a blood thirsty validation to his final revenge, both on his part and the audiences.  The ending is bittersweet, as Munny has fully resorted back to the way he was, the only thing he ever was good at.

 

A Few Good Men is famous for hilarious lines, incredibly famous lines, tangents, one character setting back the women's lib movement a decade and a rewatchability factor that is absolutely through the roof.  It also contains an argument, which is at the crux of the movie, which, in essence is a clash between multiple opposing idealogies.  My favorite line from this movie is what the division is about, "I have neither the time or the inclination to explain myself to a man who sleeps under the blanket of freedom I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it."  It's the end justifies the means argument, and although Aaron Sorkin wrote the characters in such a way that you rooted for Tom Cruise and despised Jack Nicholson(In high level asshole form in this one).  However, Sorkin did an excellent job of eloquating the "End justifies the means" argument.  Nicholson and Kiefer Sutherland were pretentious, sexist, douchebags. In the end, the death of Santiago, in the long run, saved lives, but did that make it right? Rarely does a cheesy, highly quotable, highly rewatchable movie give lead to such an ethical discussion. I respect that.  A Few Good Men also gets props, or knocks, depends on your view, for creating the patented West Wing walking down the hallway while a conversation is occurring scene. This was created by Rob Reiner to add some physical activitity to a seen and copied ad nauseum afterwards. The lesson, as always, Rob Reiner is the fucking man.

 

This was a brutally hard decision.  But in the end, A Few Good Men advances because it’s so damn rewatchable.  Cheers to the two best movies of 1992, I hate to see Unforgiven go so soon, but such is the rules of our seeding. Onward we go.

 

(4)        Aladdin vs (5) Malcom X

 

Disney vs Spike Lee.  Denzel Washington vs Aladdin.  Angela Bassett vs Jasmine.  Speaking of Jasmine I am going to go on a little bit of tangent here.  As far as I’m concerned Jasmine was the best looking princess that Disney had.  Better than Aurora from Sleeping Beauty, Ariel from Little Mermaid, Belle from Beauty and the Beast, and don’t even get me started on that frumpy Snow White.  Jasmine had the looks, the personality, the brains.  She had it all.  My six year old self had quite a crush on a cartoon.  Maybe that is why I’m still single. 

 

Anyways back to the movies.  Malcom X was a fantastic movie but I can not advance it past Aladdin for a couple reasons.  The first reason is the ever present rewatchablity factor.  Go ask anyone who was born in the 1980s which movie they would rather see and I would venture a guess that 70% would say Aladdin.  The other reason is just the quality of the movie.  Spike Lee had not yet found his niche yet in his directing mode which he would find later, and Disney was on a roll.  They were cranking out hit after hit after hit and haven’t stopped since. 

 

The secondary characters were great for Aladdin too.  You had Abu, Iago and the Sultan.  All hilarious.  And let us not forget the Genie.  Robin Williams was so funny in that role they made two more movies just so they could get more Genie to the masses.  Add to the fact that “A Whole New World” is the best Disney song ever and you have a movie that makes the Final Four. 

 

 

(2)        Last of the Mohicans vs (10) Batman Returns

 

Frankly I think that Last of the Mohicans got an easy draw to the Final Four.  Don’t get me wrong Batman Returns is a good movie but it does not hold a candle to the Mohicans.  Yes, Max Shrek might be one of the better characters in all of Batman lore but it isn’t on the same level. 

 

The great thing about Last of the Mohicans is that Michael Mann really makes you feel empathetic towards Daniel Day-Lewis’ character.  Even though he is killing all of these American soldiers he is so lonely.  He takes out the fact that is the only one left by killing everyone in his path.  He welcomes death.  He knows that this will only end one way for him and then he will join his brethren, and he just wants to take out as many of the enemy as he can. 

 

One more thing about Last of the Mohicans.  I heard the theme song “Promentory” just a little bit ago and I felt like I wanted to go out and attack some people myself.  That song is just so perfect for the movie.  It is all strings and percussion.  The main instrument you hear is the Violin going low and some slight percussion.  And then it crescendo’s into full on orchestra that will make you want to run thru a wall.  That is all you need for a great song. 

 

(3)        Glen Garry Glen Ross vs (6) Waynes World

 

Glengarry Glen Ross kind of reminds me of a Cohen Brothers movie in that it might show too accurate a side of humanity. The movie is plenty entertaining(The dialog guarantees that), but it also shines a light on some pathetic characters. However, the dialog is, I can't overstate this, fantastic. Their is a flow to the speech, like some of the characters are on a mental autopilot. Ricky Roma(Al Pacino) is the only character with a certifiable, logic driven pulse. Glengarry Glen Ross is a collection of great scenes, and is a highly entertaining movie, that leaves you feeling no better for the future of humanity.

 

 

Waynes World is quite the opposite. The movie is hilarious and uplifting(once they pick the right ending). Rob Lowe plays the perfect smarmy jerk, Tia Carrere is the beautiful lead singer who sees past all of Wayne's flaws(Bad haircut, lives with his parents, doesn't have a job) and their relationship is amusing. And how about Lara Flynn Boyle's little bit part as the epitome of a stage 5 clinger fifteen years before Wedding Crashers ever hit the screen? The humor in Waynes World isn't cheap, and when it is, its on purpose.

 

This matchup comes down to one movie that leaves you feeling kind of bad, and one movie that leaves you feeling pretty good. I'm going with the good, party on Wayne.

 

 

Final Four

 

(9) A Few Good Men vs (4) Aladdin

 

At this point, what's there to say about A Few Good Men that hasn't been said already?  How about influence?  This movie inspired a full decade of court room drama movies and television shows.  Rarely has a movie made the inside of a courtroom seem so interesting.  I am convinced this movie started the craze of the audience being interested in shows and movies that demistified certain areas of life and spoke them in relatively simple terms.  In the 90's, these were the legal world/courtroom and the ER/hospitals.  Now it's escalated into countless Law and Order and CSI episodes about criminal investigations, a downgrade in my opinion.  The Practice/ER/NYPD Blue, were all great shows.  So yeah, A Few Good Men turned out to be a hell of a trendsetter.

 

Aladdin is a simply magical movie.  This was back when Disney had its fastball, no, not just a good fastball, we are talking Randy Johnson in 1995 with a 99 mph heater with wicked movement. “A Whole New World” is definitely in the pantheon of great Disney songs and the whole story is classic Disney. Kids are still going to be watchin this movie years from now.

 

Overall, A Few Good Men is a more entertaining movie for a man of my tastes(an adult) and Aladdin, although a great movie, just doesn’t draw me in like A Few Good Men. Tough decision though.

 

 

(2) Last of the Mohicans vs (6) Waynes World

 

 

I feel like these two clips encompass their respective movies pretty well.  You have the raw emotion of Mohicans and you have the hilarity that is Waynes World.  So which one of these movies takes it and makes it to the finals.

 

I love Waynes World as much as the next guy but I can’t get it past Mohicans.  The raw emotion that you see from Daniel Day-Lewis and the rest of the cast you just don’t see in Waynes world.  Don’t get me wrong I like Rob Lowe but he just doesn’t bring the same heat that Mohicans does.

 

 

Championship

 

(9) A Few Good Men vs (2) Last of the Mohicans

 

And here we are at the championship matchup.  This matchup is a tough one but it is not as bad as tough as the second round.  The matchup between A Few Good Men and Unforgiven took us three days to figure out who to win.  This one did not take as long.  While Last of the Mohicans was a movie that left me speechless the first time I saw it, it does not win here.

The reason why A Few Good Men wins the whole thing is simple.  There are no bad scenes and no bad characters.  From the confusion of Louden Downey to the staunch belief of Harold Dawson that he did nothing wrong to the judge being confident when he had to be, the minor characters played a huge role.  The whole team of Lt Commander Galloway, Lt Kaffee and Lt Sam Weinberg all played their roles so well.   Kaffee was the cocky attorney that needed to be knocked down a few pegs, Weinberg played the cool cucumber and Galloway played the bridge between the two. 

 

The Last of the Mohicans was a great movie but it did not have the amount of sheer brilliance of characters that A Few Good Men has.  A Few Good Men becomes the first non #1 seed to win one of our brackets as it takes down the big honchos in this movie and takes the crown. 

 

Oh and here is a link to the best interrogation scene in movie history.

 

 

Movie Drinking Games: Post 4. The Princess Bride

Here at Table 71 we love a good flick. We also love a good cocktail. However what we enjoy even more is mixing those two together. As always we have chosen 7 events that show up periodically throughout the movie. When these events take place you take a "drink". We have also chosen 3 events that show up only once in the movie. These are the "shot" events. It is very important that you don't miss the shot events. The only other rule we have at Table 71 for our Movie Drinking Games is have fun. You are enjoying a good movie with good people (or alone if that is the way you swing.. we don't judge)

Without further ado, here are the official drinking game rules for, The Princess Bride.

Drink every time Vincinni says "Inconcievable"
Drink every time Inigo Montoya says his "Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya..." spiel
Drink every time someone is knocked unconscious
Drink every time someone says "Humperdinck
Drink every time the kid interrupts the story
Drink every time you hear "As you wish"
Drink every time you hear the phrase "Dread Pirate Roberts


Take a shot for going in against a Sicilian when death is on the line
Take a shot for Rodent's of Unusual Size
Take a shot for "I want my father back you son of a bitch."

If you have a movie that you would like us to turn into a drinking game please leave in the comments below.
Now go enjoy your night at the movies!

Why I love Movies: The Hunger Games and First Person Adaptations

I like to read. A lot. So, naturally, I've seen a lot of books get turned into movies. Its easy to take some third person Dan Brown book and create a movie out of it.  Hell, The Da Vinci code is essentially a script.  All the characters thoughts are expressed in dialog.

Turning a first person narrative into a movie is something else entirely.  Most of the time, the directors choose to opt for expressing the main characters thoughts through narration.  In the case of the Shawshank Redemption, this strategy works perfectly.  In fact, Morgan Freeman's narration is one of the most memorable aspects of the movie.  The narration adds a beautiful eloquence to a gritty and often dark tale. Another solid use of a narrator is American Beauty. Kevin Spacey's voiceovers are used sparingly and mark key transitions in the movie.

Unfortunately, adding a narrator screws up the timing and the pacing of a movie.  Narration is often included in montages, and, if used in excess, the non narrated scenes end up feeling rushed and ill fitting. Take the movie Wanted, what was the purpose of the main character narrating? Nothing was added that could've shown otherwise.

Or, you could do what Barbara Streissand did with The Prince of Tides. She took a book about the life of a Southern family with a romantic subplot, a book that excelled because of its beautiful narration, and turned the romantic subplot into the main plot.  If there ever was a film for voice over a lot of voice over narration, it was this. Instead Streissand wanted to be the star and almost entirely disregarded it.

The Hunger Games isn't a book with a tremendous amount of dialog.  Instead you immersed in the thoughts of Katniss.  The thoughts are descriptive and emotional, a sensory experience.  This, in my opinion, is hard to shoot.  The director chooses to immerse the audience in the experiences of Katniss.  She is disoriented, at times dizzy, frightened, confused, and we as an audience are made to feel the same way.  Jennifer Lawrence is an actress who can say very much with just a twitch of her lip.  She typically plays characters with a hard exterior, which fits the character of Katniss perfectly. 

There was a right way to make this movie, and a wrong way.  The director, thankfully, chose to not be heavyhanded in his storytelling.  He let the audience experience the story and let the movie, for the most part, speak for itself.  Cheers.

1991 Movie Bracket

So here at Table 71 we have decide to to an ultimate movie bracket for each year.  What that means is that we take the Top 10 movies by Domestic Gross Sales, put in six wild cards and have them duke it out to see what will reign supreme as the top movie of the year.  We seed the movies based on their Rotten Tomato score and may the best one win.

The next year that we are going with is the year 1991, the year of the unoriginal movie.  The top 16 is littered with adaptations of books, television shows, children stories, and older movies.  This was the start of Hollywood running out of original ideas.  This will be a common theme throughout the next 20 years, but the early 90s were the start of it.  Now without further ado which adaptation is going all the way to the top.  Let’s go on that journey together.

 

Round 1

(1)    Terminator 2 vs (16) Sleeping with the Enemy

Terminator 2 might be one of the finest sequels ever made.  It's a movie that upon its release made the original Terminator look like the dated 80's movie it was.  Arnold was positively iconic in this film, and Linda Hamilton oozed unbridled, but believable insanity.  The original Terminator was a frightening thriller, T2 evolved into an epic. Never before had CGI been incorporated so impressively into a film, and it was awesome.

Sleeping With The Enemy was another solid fastball from Julia Roberts. This is a clever and creepy little movie, Patrick Bergin is just plain weird. Although this movie can't stand up to the T2 it will make damn sure you fold the towels right.

This is a typical 1-16 massacre and Terminator advances to round 2.

(8) What About Bob vs (9) Cape Fear

What about Bob? is hilarious and charming. I saw this movie once, and it forever ensconced itself in my brain. This is one of my favorite Bill Murray performances(a distant 2nd to Groundhog Day). It's hilarious how he turns Dreyfuss's family against him and the Dreyfussian rage that follows.

Regretfully, I have not seen the 1962 version of Cape Fear, so this haunting version is the only one I know.  De Niro does a great job with Max Cady, who, in my opinion is the best kind of villain. Yeah, he's twisted and sick, but you get his motivations, and he's a hell of a lot tougher then Nick Nolte's cowardly character.  I think the "Come out, come out, wherever you are" scene is a pretty accurate depiction of this.  You hire guys to kill a guy, he dispatches them like he's Bruce Lee on crack, and then you hide in the darkness because your too scared to fight him.  How am I supposed to root for a character like that? Am I? I kind of enjoyed the role reversal .  The thought provoking Cape Fear advances to the next round to face off against Arnie.

(4) Beauty and the Beast vs (13) Robin Hood

In the early 90s you had two things that you couldn’t escape from.  Disney movies and Kevin Costner.  The first round matches these two against each other as Kevin Costner and his band of Merry Men goes off against Cogsworth, Lumiere and the rest of the gang. 

Even though the Little Mermaid was first, Beauty and the Beast started the titanic run for Disney in the early 90s, with Aladdin and The Lion King to follow.  Those other two movies will also show up on this countdown and they will also be a fairly high seed I’m guessing.  In Beauty and the Beast you have two of the all-time great Disney Characters in Gaston and Chip.  Both of them are funny when they want to be and serious when they need to be.  This movie is a perfect example of finding good in every person, a trait which doesn’t happen all too often.

In the 1990 movie bracket I wrote about my lack of enthusiasm for Kevin Costner.  It’s not that I think he is a bad actor per say, I just think he is one of those actors that should be typecasted.  It is no coincidence that his best two roles are in Bull Durham and Tin Cup (If you want to argue Field of Dreams please leave a comment and we will hash it out).  His role is best as a washed up comedic athlete.  Since he isn’t drunk, an athlete, or all that funny I don’t like him in this role so yes, Beauty and the Beast wins.

(5) Thelma & Louise vs (12) The Addams Family

In one movie you have the start of Brad Pitt’s career and in the other movie you have the start of Christina Ricci’s career.  Feel old yet?

I am totally man enough to admit that I love Thelma & Louise.  Geena Davis and Susan Sarandon are perfect as the title characters.  This was back when Harvey Keitel was in every good movie and he doesn't disappoint here.  I love well executed road trip movies and this is certainly one of them.  Just thinking about this movie makes me want to watch this flick again, it has been a few years.

As for the Addams Family it had Christopher Lloyd as Uncle Fester and Angelica Houston as Morticia, but it really was Christina Ricci as Wednesday Adams that stole the movie.  Her deadpanning to the camera was hilarious and she stole every scene she was in.  This movie is all about an accountant wanting to steal the Addams Family’s money and sending in Christopher Lloyd as a fake Uncle Fester.  Wednesday Adams was not having anything of it and her scenes with Christopher Lloyd are the highlights of this movie.  Unfortunately there not enough of these scenes and the rest of the movie is just blah.

Thelma & Louise is not just the movie that launched Brad Pitt, it is undeniably the better movie between these two.  Congrats on advancing ladies!

(2)    Boyz in the Hood vs (15) Hook

John Singleton made an absolute gem of a movie with Boyz N The Hood, the story of three friends growing up in the ghetto.  The cast is deep and rock solid.  You have all of these colorful and often unsavory characters in this movie pulling Cuba Gooding Jr's character all in different directions. Cuba's character is probably the straightest in the movie, at least in the beginning, before the pressures and tragedies really attempt to corrupt him.  Through it all, Lawrence Fishburne as his father is relentlessly honest and articulate, trying desperately to pull his son out of the life so many of his friends have fallen into.  Boyz N The Hood is a mercilessly fair and well made movie.

Hook was a movie that I grew up on and always thought it was a good movie.  You had Dustin Hoffman as Hook, Julia Roberts as Tinker Bell, and Robin Williams as a Peter Pan who loses his magic and grows up.  As far as live action children stories go you could do a lot worse.  The Lost Boys are fantastic and who doesn’t shed a tear when Rufio meets the end of Hook’s blade.  At the end of the day though the best character is Smee.  As Hook’s right hand man it is his job to be at his masters’ beckon call and he does so well. 

As good as Hook is, it met a terrible matchup here in Boyz in the Hood.  That is not a movie that can be ousted in the first round, so as Hook would say “Bad Form” as Dustin Hoffman gets eaten by that alligator once again.

(7) JFK vs (10) Father of the Bride

JFK, if nothing else, is an interesting movie.  The cast is excellent, it’s well made, but none of that is really relevant.  The topic is what makes JFK so interesting.  It ensconces itself in the conspiracy theories that have been spun over the years.  It tells the story convincingly, so convincing is it that after the movie you totally believe in the "facts" of the case.  That is, until you do a little research and realize Oliver Stone is a quack

Father of the Bride is a classic Steve Martin movie.  What I mean by classic is that it has some funny moments but for the most part it just leaves you wanting more.  This had the potential to be a good movie because it is relatable.  I feel like every man in the world who had a daughter knew what Steve Martin was feeling and yet it didn’t do it for me.  Maybe if we do this bracket in ten years and I have a daughter I might relate to it a little bit more but until that die it is just a so-so movie.  That is why it gets knocked out in the first round.

(3)    Silence of the Lambs vs (14) Naked Gun 2 ½

The Silence of the Lambs is a great, haunting, creepy movie.  What's to say about this movie that wouldn't sound redundant?  How about the fact that after playing Buffalo Bill Ted Levine went on to play entirely strait laced characters for the next twenty years?  Or that this absolute classic spawned Hannibal, a surefire candidate for a bad sequels bracket whenever there is one.  Hopkins gets all the love, and rightfully so, but its Jodie Foster who carries this movie.  That's all I'll say for now, I think this titan moves on.

Let me get this out of the way right now.  I find Leslie Nielsen to be freaking hilarious.  Some of his one-liners are in the pantheon of one-liners.  Unfortunately none of those one-liners are from the sequel to the criminally underrated original Naked Gun.  This movie is not terrible, but when you see what it is going up against I’m sure that you, our esteemed readers, realize that this movie can not advance to the next round.  Hannibal onward!

(6) City Slickers vs (11) Point Break

So, City Slickers gave Billy Crystal top billing. And this was back when Billy had his fastball. But damnit, Jack Palance stole this movie.  This was back when the old codger was doing cologne commercials with the tag line, "Makes a man feel, sexy".  His portrayal of a tough bastard cowboy dwarfs Billy Crystal playing every Billy Crystal character ever.  But, let's give a shoutout to Daniel Stern, who decided that the only way he was going to get signed on for roles was to get the shit kicked out of him in every movie.  I Cheer Daniel Stern, your sacrifices on the altar of physical comedy are not forgotten.

A little piece of useless information before we get into our Point Break synopsis.  Does anyone know who directed this movie?  Why it is none other than Kathryn Bigelow, she of The Hurt Locker and Zero Dark Thirty fame.  Now I am just as shocked as you are that she got her start directing Keanu Reeves, Patrick Swayze, and Gary Busey but those are the facts.  By the way let’s look at those three actors again.  Keanu Reeves.  Patrick Swayze.  Gary Busey.  In the same movie.  Can you imagine that set?  That must have been the most unintentional funny set in cinema history.  Unfortunately that alone is not enough to get it past Billy Crystal, Jack Palance, Daniel Stern and City Slickers.

Great Eight

(1)    Terminator 2 vs (9) Cape Fear

Now we get to the good movies.  Both Terminator 2 and Cape Fear are movies that I enjoy watching, mood depending.  If I am in a mood to shut my mind off and watch some ass kicking action then you can do far worse than Terminator 2.  If I am in the mood to watch a thought-provoking why-does-the-bad-guy-always-have-to-lose that Robert DeNiro made famous, Cape Fear is the choic.  Both of these movies are still good to this day, when many movies made during that time period haven’t aged well.

So who wins?  Even though Max Cady and Cape Fear does make you think about who is really the bad guy, Terminator 2 has to advance here.  Everything from the acting, directing, editing, music, was so well done.  The special effects were not over the top but were good enough to believe that a man made out of mimetic poly-alloy was sent back in time to kill a teenager.  Works for me.  Arnie and the Terminator advance to the Final Four.

(4)    Beauty and the Beast vs (5) Thelma & Louise

You can’t help but feel bad for the beast.  Sure he was a dick and that is why he was cursed, but once he sees a beautiful woman he is just as awkward as the average horny American teen-ager.  It was sweet.  Belle was a no-nonsense girl who found the good in everyone and even though it was tough to find in the Beast she did.  This movie has one of the most iconic scenes in Disney history, with Belle and the Beast dancing around the Grand Ballroom while Mrs. Potts sings still tugging at my heartstrings.  And it should at yours as well. 

Thelma & Louise has a pretty iconic scene in it as well.  At the end of the movie when they realize they are trapped and they will not surrender they decide to drive off a cliff.  That scene has stayed with me all these years and since you don’t see them land, you hope that they make it to the other side. It is hope.  That is what makes that scene memorable.  Even though you are 99.99% certain they just drove to their death, you have that .01% chance that always makes you wonder.  That is what good movies do. 

So which scene moves on to the finals to face Terminator 2?  The unknown hope of Thelma & Louise against the growing hope of Beauty and the Beast.  I am going to with the known hope and Beauty and the Beast advances to the Final Four.  Gaston would be so proud.

(2)    Boyz in the Hood vs (7) JFK

This matchup begins and ends with authenticity. JFK is a movie that doesn't let facts get in the way of a good conspiracy theory and Boyz N the Hood is, to its bone, authentic.  There isn't really a fairy tale ending, yeah, it’s a little uplifting, but Cuba's character is really only one of two characters that any real hope springs(the other, is probably the most tragic).  

Boyz N The Hood, at least to me, has far more memorable moments than JFK. Hell, the most memorable JFK related moment is the Seinfeld re-enactment.   Boyz N The Hood has Furious(Lawrence Fishburne) spinning a tale about how white men moved cocaine and heroin into the ghetto's to kill black men. Ice Cube's "Do we have a problem?" scene is probably the most famous. And when Cuba decides he's going to enact vengeance, and Furious gives him a speech/verbal undressing rivalled by few.  Just a real, truly, powerful movie.  That is why it gets the edge here.

(3)    Silence of the Lambs vs (6) City Slickers

City Slickers is a fun movie, a great mid life crisis movie.  It's a good old fashioned tale of life throwing characters an unexpected adventure and how they rise to the occasion, all through a comedic lens.  Is this a great movie? No, but it’s not supposed to be. It's meant to be enjoyed, and it certainly is.

Silence of the Lambs is about society's underbelly bubbling up into plain sight.  Although Buffalo Bill and Hannibal Lecter are the epitome's of calculated insanity, Clarice Starling aside, the rest of the characters are sordid and self serving.  This movie gets away with its eccentricity because it does it so well. Few movies force the viewer to mutter, "What the fuck?" In a tone that combines disgust, horror and appreciation.
 

City Slickers is a fine movie, but this is where we separate the movies from the films. And Silence of the Lambs is a film my friends.

The Final Four 

Well now this is interesting.  I think that this might be the one and only time that the top 4 seeds advance to the Final Four.  This is what we are calling our chalk bracket as the higher seeded movie advanced every single time except for once.  I think for the most part you readers will agree with the choices made but if you do not please leave us who you think should be in there and why in the comments below.  We here at Table 71 love a good debate.  Now onto the Final Four! 

 (1)    Terminator 2 vs (4) Beauty and the Beast 

 Beauty and the Beast was a truly uplifting story about looking beyond the exterior of a person, that there is more to someone than meets the eye.  It had great secondary characters in Lumiere, Cogsworth, Mrs. Potts, Chip, and of course Gaston.  Gaston is one of the most underrated villains in movie history.  He is an absolute riot and the song below is one of the many reasons why. 

That being said I can not put Beauty and the Beast in the Finals.  Terminator 2 was as close to a perfect movie as you will find on this countdown.  The secondary characters in this movie were fantastic as well, from Miles Bennett Dyson to John Connor’s step parents.  Every single character brings something different and unique and necessary to the movie.  Every scene in this movie is so crucial in telling the story of how the machines took over and why someone is always trying to kill John.  As mentioned earlier Linda Hamilton was fantastic as the crazy protective mother who would do anything to save her son.   All in all this movie had no flaws and while Beauty and the Beast was a very good movie, it gets knocked out here as the Terminator makes the finals. 

(2)    Boyz in the Hood vs (3) Silence of the Lambs 

 

Parting is such sweet sorrow. Boyz N The Hood is a fantastic movie.  It's true authentic filmmaking.  That movie is good, but Silence of the Lambs is better.  Hannibal Lecter was on screen for what? 12 minutes?  Yet he instantly became one of the greatest characters in cinema history.  How coy and genius is a movie that causes the audience to half support a homicidal cannibal towards the end of the film?  It’s the idea that in all levels of life, there is a certain morality, and those that follow it.  As dark and twisted as this movie is, I often find myself picking it up halfway through and anxiously awaiting the next great scene.  Whether its Starling and Lecter's first meeting, "Put the lotion in the basket", or Lecter's artistic dismembering of his guards.  How clever, and how imitated, is the ending scene where Starling is searching through Buffalo Bill's house with night vision goggles on.  Silence of the Lambs understands that anticipation and the audiences imagination builds terror on its own. It doesn't need to create too many false jumps or artificially build tension.  Silence of the Lambs comes of its terror naturally, and that, on its own, is brilliant filmmaking.

Championship 

The finale, two heavyweights of cinema and two iconic movies.  Silence of the Lambs was a completely unique movie, that cannot be duplicated and has been imitated poorly by a great many movies.  Weird shit like The Cell ring a bell anyone?  Terminator 2 had truly groundbreaking special effects and kicked off the big budget action movies of the 90's.  Director James Cameron first utilized the effect that he used for the Terminator's liquid metal in the 80's movie The Abyss (with the impeccable Ed Harris, yep, he didn't have hair then either).  In T2, he refined it and incorporated it in ways that still stand the test of time 22 years later.  A lot of movies, even movies as relatively new as Lord of the Rings have CGI that hasn't aged well.  T2's effects have held up remarkably with few exceptions. But, that's not why this was the greatest movie of 1991.  It's because T2 was so fucking entertaining. Every action scene is a home run.  From the motorcycle chase on the freeway to the gun battle at Cyberdyne Systems, every scene is thrilling.  The movie is damn quotable as well. What makes this truly the perfect action movie is that it makes the audience care.  There is a legit relationship between The Terminator and young John Connor as the kid tries to humanize the robot.  And yeah, every now and then, it gets a little dusty when Arnold says, "I know now why you cry, but it is something I can never do." What an absolute outstanding movie.  LOVE IT! Hasta la vista baby!